Life is topsy turvy, it's rather up and down

If you force a smile
you'll soon be called a Clown

Between the wishing and waiting, the demanding of whispers, a command to Speak Up, little birds escapeless in my head, and varied other unpleasantness, rocks and hard places have often sounded comfortable.
It has been a long month. I'm back. Don't worry. There was also a lot of working and a not completely unsubstantial amount of playing. Can we catch up slow? I'm not sure if I know how to do this anymore. I feel like I'm missing something but would like to find it on my own, just to avoid that abashed feeling you get when you think you've lost your pencil and someone says silly, it's in your hair.