Feb 4, 2008

It's Sunday morning

Do you know where your phone is

Oh my God where is it

"Sophie's been talking on it for seven hours", I thought and I woke up.
What is Mum in hysterics about? Not that it's rare but starting in a little early today aren't we, I contemplated and then my mind woke up a little more, my heart jumped and my breath flew to my Da in case he needed it, until I heard his voice through my doorway.

Guys get up, there's a fire.

To hear him afraid was like a kick in the chest and I got up, or down, or whichever way it is when you half fall out of bed. Not knowing what was on fire we went to the kitchen and we saw the weird flush on everything the glow from the window and I think I will never forget lifting an eerie blind to look out and see the shed we had built for the generators, tall with flames 15 feet from us and two feet from the white fuel tank. The tank didn't register at first with me.

It's gonna blow up
, someone said simply

and then we got out.

It was dark and dense gray foggy as we drove the cars up the Hill, heads stuck out windows to see around the frost, Mum not even bothering as she tore up the drive taking out all the reflectors that marked the sides and narrowly missing a maple.

When the Men in trucks came we watched from the icy road, some of us standing out and some sitting in the warm cars. K cried because it was too much to be woken so early, to see flames in her window, to fear. We hugged her and the men put out the fire.

We walked down the drive when we could see just fog and smoke and the sun peering through, and the fuel tank standing over all the scorched things and the wooden stand that holds it, the stand that stood two feet from the fire that melted the house siding... scarcely charred.

*
This morning K and I were poking carefully among the ashes and metal and wire. What are you doing there? asked my brother. She told him exactly what I had asked her to come out and do with me.

We are looking for angel feathers

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