IMPORTANT NOTICE:

After a recent Googling, I am crestfallen to realize that I am not the very first person ever to think of the neologism Metro-gnome, in fact someone has not only thought of it but also gave it a clever and humorous definition, "Small, pointy-hatted creature who has been forced to live in big cities due to loss of wooded habitat", which makes me even more obviously plagiaristic and inferior. I'm going to eat a lot of chocolate now.