Jul 21, 2007

All the exciting things happen to me

The reason the toothpick was on the floor was Sophie, it is always Sophie said everyone. I was determined to be sociable for once and heaved myself from the dumps and put all my note books and other books away and when I was walking out of my bedroom, my foot came down on it. It stuck halfway in slightly below my big toe, the other half mostly snapped off only to break off completely when Sophie tried immediately to pull it out. Now I had something stabbed in my left foot, and with no end protruding anymore. thanks very much it IS always you, I think I thought but I wasn't really thinking at all. It hurt and started to hurt more driving to the hospital; I kept reminding myself to breathe; I wished we could be there right now and that we didn't live 15 whole minutes from the ER and that Mom didn't drive like Gran. At the hospital I hobbled in and sat and waited in this room and that, answering paperwork questions to the nurse named Chris (me too, I said to him), all the while holding my foot and starting to seeth inside would you just get it out!!! I'll tell you everything!! It was forever, it was going numb, I hate everyone in this hospital. I would like to update my pain rating now, please.
The first doctor to work on me was nice until I decided he was fake and decidedly repulsive - I did not like him. The shot to deaden the area was awful but after it was numb he went to work and he worked and worked. I don't like to remember the feeling where I could feel nothing but the pulling, odd odd odd. It didn't budge. The groan "Damn. That's in deep." is not something I imagine they teach you in med school to reassure patients, especially not patients who already don't like you. He gave that pull a million times and I did feel it now and then but said I didn't. Just gritted my teeth watching the drops of blood go up the suction tube thing like tiny crimson tadpoles, slow quivering tadpoles.
He was of course not going to get it out. But he knew a doctor specialist guy person in Hannibal who could - except by then in was nearly 10 pm. He said maybe it will have to wait until morning, the doctor specialist guy person could come then. The thought of wood still in my foot all night was awful. He gave a last wrench and I winced prayed God let it come out this please please time please. It didn't, they bandaged it up and he went to phone the other doctor, Mom went to phone home and I waited. All that had happened that day and now this was so close to me still. I cried inside until
a little man with a mustache and balding head and glasses and a reek of cigarettes that was somehow comforting in an unhealthy way came in. I'm the radiologist, said he, we'll have to wheel you down here and X-ray that foot.
I liked Radiology. It was cold and the light was dim and soft not like hospital light at all. I'm a girl I'm under 18, they are of course required to ask the Question and he did so sheepishly that I liked him. In amused retrospect I should have said twins loudly and proudly. But then I probably couldn't have gone into Radiology where it was dim and cool not like hospital light at all.


Back in room one the first doctor said the second doctor was coming tonight in 45 minutes. I didn't remember whether or not that was a good thing, the meds made me sleepish. I was already sleepish. Another wait. why not. doze.


Doctor Specialist Guy Person was in shorts and T-shirt with the most laughable blond hair like a surfer wave, he was the realest person in the whole place. He came from his sons' sports game and I could have hugged him - but not yet - there was still a foreign body in my foot and Dr. Damitsdeep had said if Doctor Wave could not extract it, I'd have to be put under for surgery. But he started to work and confidently; I was a good deal numb still but could now and then feel it; so he had to give one more deadening shot. that was the worst of all. It hurt like the other ones but they subsided and this one did not, it hurt more and more like he was jabbing in further and further. I forgave him because he said this will hurt a lot and because he was a good person. I didn't feel anything anything after it.

The good doctor, when he realized I didn't speak chatted with Mom as he excavated the toothpick that as it turned out was stuck between some stubborn tendons - they had a grand time I should say, the company NOT the tendons - I fell 1/4ly asleep and listened and felt the tugging until until finally finally finally finally finally finally finally finally finally finally finally finally finally the doctor said there it is. Inch long, bloody bloody.


At home Sophie met us at the car, holding something in her hand. "I saved all the red Starburst for you," she said abashedly and I smiled for the first time.


This happens when I don't think circumspectly when I write, I write an awful lot lot lot and like in rapids or torrents. and you may think about nothing important? But you must understand, I never even took aspirin before, hardly a pill in my life, never the hospital, never emergencies. This is all so traumatising and just so terribly exciting!!


OK, I'll delete it.


Today I seem to be able to put some weight on it and the crutches hurt my hands so I will to get along without them. But I am not used to moving at a glacial pace at all. Already I want to run. Inability is intolerable.

Stupid, stupid toothpick.


Arwen said...

A reminder perhaps that no matter how we plan, no matter how much we want things to go our way, we are always influenced by those around us... and where we plan to go, is often in a completely other direction from where we end up going. I'm glad you're ok!! I was shocked to find out you are so young...lol. I am almost 32... though the age of our bodies is rarely a reflection of the age of our soul...

Christina said...

You are very far from the first that's been shocked at my age, sometimes I am surprised with myself, because always always I felt older. But I am seventeen and you thirty-two, yet for some days now I've enjoyed more talking with you than with anyone my age, as has been the case many times in my (short) life - it seems it matters less than a lot would make it out to be.

"Let no man despise"

Arwen said...

Indeed... I do agree...